As I sat watching the news my mind drifted back to other dealings that I have had with Jackasses. My sister had a Jenny who was known for her load pulling ability. In fact the donkey had several trophies and ribbons to her credit. The Jenny had two colts, but unlike their mother, nothing was ever done with them. They could be touched, but that was the extent of their interaction with humans.

  When I worked in the lawn and garden industry, we did a film comparing other equipment with ours. We needed to have some comments from the competitor’s point of view, so I went over and interviewed the donkeys. I recorded them braying and hee-hawing. They were the perfect commentators for their assignment. They did a good job and seemed to enjoy it. Of course, I did have to give them a treat after each conversation.

  One day, my sister asked if I could trim the colt’s feet. My friend Dan was down from Tennessee and after a short discussion we decided that surely we could trim the donkey’s hooves. We got a halter on the first one. The only thing we could see of his feet was when they whizzed by us as he kicked and pawed. After about forty-five minutes of wrestling we got him down and hogtied. The problem now was the fact that both of us were too exhausted to trim his feet. We turned him loose and told my sister that she needed to get a farrier who could tranquilize them to trim their hooves.

  When I taught school in Yatesville, Ga., there was an annual fundraiser that featured a donkey basketball game. It was during these games that I perfected my ability to be bucked off a donkey. I also learned that the donkey always wins. So when we had the donkey softball games in Stockbridge, I let others demonstrate their skill and I provided moral support.

  In Yatesville, the FFA had a calf show each year. One year I had a student that was having problem halter-breaking his calf. I started working with him after school to see if we could remedy this problem. When I was in the 4-H club, I had a steer that was very difficult to break. The County Agent said that it was the meanest steer that had ever been shown at the Southeastern Fair. As it turns out, my steer was mild compared to the one we were working with.

  I was sitting on the bench in front of TJ Mullins grocery store one afternoon. We were discussing this problem calf. One of the local cattlemen spoke up and said, “If you will bring me that steer, I will break him and give him back to you tomorrow.” We immediately went and borrowed a trailer to deliver the steer. When we arrived the farm hands put a show halter on him. Show halters have a chain that goes under the calf’s chin and is part of the lead rope. Then they went and got a donkey out of the barn. The donkey was wearing a leather halter. The steer was tied to the donkey’s halter with about five feet of rope between them.

  At first the steer set back on the rope. The donkey held his ground. With the chain causing discomfort under his chin, the calf then charged at the donkey, which wheeled around and kicked the steer in the ribs. This went on for about thirty minutes, set back, charge and kick. You could tell the steer was confused about what to do next. We left them there overnight and when we went back the next morning the steer was broke. You could pick up the lead rope and the seven hundred pound calf would follow you anywhere.

  So if you have room for a donkey, I would highly recommend it. You need to start training it from birth so you can work with its feet and groom it, but never let it become a newscaster. They are too hard-headed, opinionated, and will say anything for a treat.

  Frank Hancock has worked as a Farm Manager, Vocational Agriculture Teacher, Vice President at Snapper and currently serves as the University of Georgia Agricultural Extension Agent in Henry County. He is a also a member of the Heritage Writers Group.