I’ve recently been reading a newly released book called “Big Friendship: How We Keep Each Other Close” by Aminatou Sow and Ann Friedman. 

  In the book, just after the title page, the authors define a Big Friendship as being “a bond of great strength, force and significance that transcends life phases, geography, and emotional shifts. It is large in dimension, affecting most aspects of each person’s life. It is full of meaning and resonance. A Big Friendship is reciprocal, with both parties feeling worthy of each other and willing to give of themselves in generous ways.”

  While reading this book, and especially after reading this description, I began to think of all of the Big Friendships that I have in my life, of which I am so grateful. 

  Now, I don’t have many friends. I am not the type of person that has 10 to 15 people they call regularly for outings or that they text in large group chats.

  My friend group is more intimate and consists of three close friends that I know will answer my call or text and pick up right where we left off, even if we have not talked in a while. 

  There is no drama in our friendships, as we are upfront and honest with our feelings and thoughts.

  Communication is very important to us, as two of my three friends live in another state. The other lives right across the street from me and is literally just a stone’s throw away.

  What is wonderful is that I have a unique friendship with each of them. 

  I met my first friend, Nova, in Army basic training in 2015. For six months, we lived together, trained together, and witnessed each other at our worst and best. We supported one another every step of the way as ‘battle buddies’ do. 

  But, when training finally ended, we went our separate ways. She went home to Connecticut and I returned to Georgia. 

  We made a point, however, to visit each other as much as we were able, trading off on who visits whom and spending quality time with one another when we finally meet up.

  During the time that we are not together, communication between one another lags, but we still make a point of checking in with one another regularly, even if it is just a few texts or a quick phone call. 

  I absolutely hate the distance between us, but if we can make a friendship last across the country and across the world, we can do anything.

  Our matching tattoos read “No matter where” in recognition of the distance between us. But the words also holds the promise that no matter the distance, we are still each other’s number one priority.

  I met my second friend, Estefi, in college when we moved into a house together with four other roommates.

  Now, most college friendships that center around being roommates do not last. But, somehow, this one did. 

  Like many roommates, we did have some disagreements and regularly got on each other’s nerves. But, she loved my honesty and I loved her ambition and fearlessness. 

  Disagreements aside, we saw qualities in each other that we valued enough to keep in our lives. 

  After college, she made a career move to New York. However much it broke my heart to see her go, I was so excited and supportive of her decision. 

  Despite the distance, we find the time to text as much as we can. We also FaceTime, which she knows I hate, but it is nice to see her face, even if it is just on a tiny screen.

  We are also pen pals, taking the time to write a letter to one another and send it via snail mail. There’s just something special about opening your mailbox and seeing your friend’s familiar writing. 

  My third friend, Ashlyn, lives across the street from me. We also lived together in college.

  I am in awe of Ashlyn’s absolute and transparent love of God and her overall kindness. She represents the woman I strive to be everyday. 

  Our adventures together on cruises or our picnics in each other’s yards make our friendship special.

  Just spending time with one another is enriching and gives us both so much happiness.

  Needless to say, I have a special relationship with each of my friends. They each bring something unique to my life. And, even though I do not have a large friend group, the three close friends that I do have are worth more than gold.

  I am so grateful for all of the Big Friendships that I have in my life.