When I was very young, my parents told me to be pleasant and smile. “Everyone likes to be around happy people,” Mom said many times.

  So, during my preteen years I looked happy by grinning a lot, or at least when my parents were watching.

  Before long, I discovered that a constantly grinning kid is not one to be trusted, totally, or so adults and teachers believe.

  They always thought I was up to no good, even when I wasn’t. But Mom was happy.

  At about the age of eleven or twelve, my mother took me aside. “Carol,” she delicately said, and I thought it was going to be one of THOSE talks.

  “It’s about time you started taking life more seriously. You shouldn’t laugh at everything.” Parents were so confusing.

  So with a little practice, I learned to grumble and became a normal teenager. Adults now understand me if I was grinning one day and grumpy and grumbling the next. Mom now felt she had taken care of my outlook on life. And perhaps she had. Or maybe as I now look back on it, it all had something to do with adolescence and puberty. I will never be sure.

  Although I passed out of my teenage years many, many years ago, I still seem to have this half and half attitude. In many situations, it really is satisfying to know I can change a bad day into a not-too-bad one with a forced smile. I can, so my husband tells me, change a bright, sunny day into a rainstorm. I hate to admit it, but he may be right … but not often, I hope. Still I realize I must be serious about serious matters. Sometimes.

  Nevertheless, it seems to me that life is just one big grin and one big grumble. My outlook depends, a great deal of the time, on the ratio of grins to grumbles. Or as I refer to it as the G/G ratio. Sort of like the wind/chill factor. Or the humiture as reported on the TV weather. You must use the G/G ratio to suit your needs. Too much grumbling makes you a depressing bore. Too much of the good stuff has people believing you are up to no good.

  But a word of caution before you start figuring your own G/G ratio. Your grin day might be a real grumble day for someone else. And that’s okay.

  However, you may then have to add an R/R factor (reasonable response) to the situation. Let me  give you an example. Many years ago, my lawn and flowers needed rain. I really grinned when the rain finally arrived, the same day my neighbor was expecting eighteen for an outdoor picnic. I used the R/R factor a lot that day with her. Like, “I feel so bad it rained today,” or “I wish it had waited until tomorrow to rain.” All the time, my lawn and flowers were having a wonderful time in the downpour, I was too delighted to grumble as she was doing, I certainly could not grin at her dilemma. So I applied the R/R factor.   Some days are easy grumble days. Then I am forced by an old habit to add a grin or two. It helps. On especially heavy grin days, I try to add a serious thought, out of respect to Mom. Maybe by grumbling a little, I appreciate the grinning much more. One thing is for sure. I can change a bad day into a  better one quite often by adding the G/G ratio. It really does work for me. Sure hope it works for you.